Only You
by Tracy-Lou
Summary: Brendan and Ste find themselves drawn to each other once more.


Disclaimer: I do not own these characters, they belong to Hollyoaks!

Summary: Brendan and Ste find themselves drawn to each other once more.

Only You

Ste wondered sometimes how he kept finding himself here, in the crook of Brendan's arm, the duvet barely covering his modesty. Brendan's modesty, that is; the man liked to sleep naked. Ste didn't mind really except they were at his place and he dreaded Amy throwing open the door unexpectedly and going off on one about it. Ste didn't have it in him to argue; he'd made his choice and he was sticking to it.

It had been an eventful few months. Lynsey's death, him and Doug splitting up, Brendan finding his way back into his life… It hadn't come easy, that was for certain. But Brendan was nothing if not persistent; except this time he hadn't been, not really. It had all began innocently enough; civil chats when they met each other in the street, Ste asking how he was coping after Lynsey, Brendan talking in that soft way he sometimes did, head bowed, eyes darting everywhere except at Ste but then suddenly fixating on his face, like it was the only thing he could truly see.

He had changed in some ways but not in others. He saw him hanging around with that Walker and Ste didn't like it one bit. There was something off about him that he couldn't quite put his finger on. He didn't like the way he looked at Brendan, like he was some kind of experiment or game. Ste noticed Joel looking at him with contempt and he'd tried asking him about it on the off chance he might let something slip. No such luck.

"What's it to you? Brendan's not a part of your life anymore"

"I still care" Ste had said stubbornly. "I've been around a lot longer than you, mate"

"Yeah? Where you been then?" Joel looked at him with narrowed eyes. "I've been the one picking up the pieces, not you"

"I have every reason to be cautious" Ste said slowly.

"And I don't?" Joel lifted up his top to show his scar. Ste had heard about the stabbing; needless to say it had unnerved him to the highest degree. He wasn't a big fan of Joel but he didn't wish him any harm.

"Listen just, keep an eye on him alright?"

"Brendan or Walker?"

Ste considered this. "Both of them. I don't want to see Brendan…" he trailed off, wondering how to finish that sentence.

"I got it" Joel said testily, walking back up the stairs.

He hadn't needed to worry in the end. Walker disappeared for a while and in that time Ste found himself getting closer to Brendan once more. It wasn't planned; Joel had been running his mouth off and Brendan had approached him one evening when he was locking up the deli, wanting to know why.

Ste shrugged. "I'm just looking out for you, aren't I?"

"What for?" Brendan asked, tilting his head to the side.

"I dunno" Ste said lamely. "Someone's got to, haven't they?"

Brendan was silent, peering at Ste as though he were the most fascinating thing in the world.

"And that's you, is it?"

"Who else you got?" Ste knew this was a foolish question. Brendan had plenty of people watching his back. For some reason this made Ste all the more determined to be one of them.

"Hm" Brendan looked at him carefully. "I appreciate yer concern. I'm fine though, really"

"And Walker?"

"I'm sure he'll come back eventually" Brendan said, his face blank.

"Yeah?" Ste asked, not even hiding the bite in his tone.

"Jealous are we?" Brendan smirked, stepping closer.

"Don't be daft" Ste said but as Brendan got nearer he felt himself starting to react to him, like he always did. "I just think, you know, we could be friends?"

Brendan was inches away from his face now. "Friends is it?"

"What else?"

Brendan reached out to cup his face. He leaned in but instead of going for Ste's mouth, he whispered into his ear: "Ye know it's only you, don't ye?"

Ste gulped. "Don't know what you mean"

Brendan chuckled, releasing him and stepping away. "I'd wager ye will find out soon enough"

He'd left after that, leaving Ste confused and frustrated. He wasn't an easy man to decipher, was Brendan Brady.

Ste should have known then where things were headed. After Doug, Ste had given himself a break. It wasn't as though the break up had been messy; in fact it had been mutual. Doug had asked him at the time if it had anything to do with Brendan. Ste couldn't honestly answer that question. Certainly since Lynsey's death Brendan and him had been on better terms but they were still very cautious of each other. Ste knew after the scam that Brendan was wary of him but in a strange way he almost seemed to respect him more for it.

A sort of uneasy relationship formed between them. Ste would smile at him when he saw him out in the village and Brendan would watch him carefully when he thought Ste wasn't looking. After the conversation about Walker, Brendan seemed a bit more sure of himself. He would come into the deli almost everyday and remain until he had finished his food, his eyes rarely leaving Ste's face.

Eventually it stopped unnerving Ste and Brendan simply became a part of his daily routine. He would even leave out his food where Brendan liked to sit. Doug would raise his eyebrows at him, a smile playing on his lips.

"Ste… are you sure you know what you're doing?"

"What you on about, Doug? He's just an ordinary customer, that's all"

Doug sighed, rubbing at his temple. "I know we aren't together anymore but I still care about you. We're friends, right?"

"Of course we are" Ste said quickly. "Really, it's innocent"

Doug didn't look entirely convinced but he dropped the subject. Ste appreciated Doug's concern, and Amy's for that matter, but they hadn't seen the changes in Brendan like Ste had. Besides that, it wasn't as though they were jumping back into bed together; Ste wasn't stupid. Sometimes though when he would feel Brendan's eyes on him he would find himself flushing, enjoying the attention. He knew it wasn't right but he couldn't help it. Brendan would always be a part of him and Ste suspected that Brendan knew that and relished it.

One day, Ste laid out his jam sandwich like clockwork, twelve thirty on the dot. Ten, fifteen minutes passed by and still no Brendan. Ste carried on as usual, pretending he didn't care. Doug kept looking over at him, almost in pity. When the clock turned to one, Ste said he was taking a break. Doug took his arm, smiling at him reassuringly.

"Maybe something came up" he said reasonably.

"I'm not bothered" Ste said, doing his best to force a smile onto his face. "I won't be long"

He put his apron on the counter, undoing a few of his buttons. It didn't take long to solve the mystery of Brendan's no show. He spied him and Walker at the bottom of the Chez Chez stairs, apparently in heated conversation. Ste walked in their direction but he kept his eyes fixed ahead of him as though he couldn't see them.

The two men stopped talking as he walked by and Ste could feel their eyes on him.

"Stephen" Brendan called out to him. Ste turned his head a fraction to show he was listening. "I'll be in soon"

"Doesn't matter, I'm taking a break" Ste continued walking, not looking back. Soon enough he heard footsteps coming up behind him.

"I wasn't expecting him" Brendan explained.

"It's fine, I don't care"

"Don't ye?" Brendan looked at him carefully.

Ste sighed, turning to face him. "Whatever you and Walker get up to isn't my business"

Brendan cocked his head to the side, his expression unreadable. "Fair enough" he said finally and turned to leave.

"Wait" Ste said, already feeling as though he would regret this.

Brendan stared him down, barely blinking.

"You wanna come for lunch?" Ste asked hesitantly. "Seeing as your sandwich is probably ruined, or Doug's eaten it"

Brendan's eyes sparkled at the mention of Doug's name. His jaw tightened fractionally. "Ye sure?" he asked, his palms out in an almost submissive gesture.

Ste nodded. "Come on, Amy's out"

Brendan smirked a little at that and Ste couldn't quite figure out why. He looked questioningly at Brendan who gave an even broader, slightly eerie, smile. "Like the old days" he noted and suddenly Ste understood.

The memories of the old days, the good times, softened Ste. He smiled at Brendan, just like he used to. Brendan looked momentarily stunned before touching the small of Ste's back, signalling that they walk. It was only when they turned that Walker caught his eye, watching them with an almost scientific interest. Ste shivered a little, prompting a confused look from Brendan. Ste shook his head dismissively and led the way home.

Xxx

Stephen didn't say much as they walked. Brendan kept waiting for the moment he would send him packing, it was bound to come eventually. He had been so cautious lately; making sure he was on his best behaviour around him. He didn't know what he wanted really, or what Stephen wanted. Brendan had been relieved when he had broken up with Doug. He was itching to ask why but couldn't quite bring himself to.

They reached the flat in no time. Stephen searched his pockets for his keys and groaned when he couldn't place them. Brendan stepped forwards, his own key in hand. Stephen gave him a measured look but Brendan simply winked at him and pushed open the door. They were indeed alone. Brendan began to idly wonder why Stephen had asked him back here. It couldn't mean anything, could it?

"I'll make us some lunch, make yourself at home" Stephen said, shuffling past him. Brendan stared around the dingy flat, pushing some toys off the sofa before sitting down, back straight and rigid.

"Jam alright?" Stephen asked, arching his eyebrows.

"Course" Brendan nodded, hands clasped tightly in his lap.

"So… Walker" Stephen said in what he probably thought were tones of subtlety.

"What about him?"

"Who is he exactly?"

Brendan shifted a little. "Met him in prison"

Stephen frowned as he brought the sandwiches over. "And that's all?"

"What do ye wanna know?"

"You'd tell me?" Stephen asked curiously, sitting beside him.

"Whatever ye want" Brendan said, thinking he would regret this promise.

"Are you seeing him?" Stephen asked, a little too sharply. Brendan looked across at him in amusement.

"Ye are jealous" he said, feeling a little triumphant.

"No" Stephen said, pouting. "Just he swans in here, all swishy hair and good cheekbones, what am I supposed to think?"

Brendan bit his lip to stop himself laughing. "Swishy hair? Cheekbones?"

Stephen shrugged, biting forlornly into his sandwich.

Brendan sighed, putting his plate aside. "We kissed, that's all"

Stephen gaped at him. "You _kissed_?"

"No big deal" Brendan shrugged.

"No big deal?" Stephen stood up, hands on his hips. "What do you think you're playing at, you!"

"What?" Brendan asked, baffled. "What do ye-"

"You can't go around snogging strangers! Especially ones you meet in prison. God knows what he's after, Brendan"

"I can take care of myself, Stephen"

"Oh I know that" Stephen crossed his arms, looking mightily annoyed.

"Is that what ye are really angry about? My safety?"

"What else?" Stephen huffed, sitting back down.

Brendan shuffled towards him, taking his jaw in his palm and turning his face towards him. "I told ye, it's only you"

"Weren't only me when you were shagging anything that moved" Stephen looked at him with reproachful eyes.

"What about ye and Douglas? Ye don't think that hurt?"

"That's different, that meant something"

"And that's exactly why it's worse" Brendan said, laughing a little. "Don't ye get that?"

Stephen shrugged, the anger flowing out of him. "I just thought… well, we're getting on alright, aren't we?"

"Better than ever" Brendan agreed.

"Can we not just start all over again?" Stephen asked in a rush as though he'd rehearsed this.

"Ye want to… get back together?" Brendan was completely stunned.

"Don't you?" Stephen looked at him keenly, his blue eyes boring into Brendan's.

Brendan considered this for about a second before he took Stephen in his arms, kissing every inch of him he could find. Stephen was beneath him in moments, legs wrapped around his waist like they belonged there. Brendan had him by the mouth, had him by the fingertips and he sure as hell wasn't going to let go, not this time.

He carried him easily to the bedroom, straddling him on the bed and stroking the sides of his hair back. It was like liquid fire, melting and merging into one. Brendan tugged his trousers down and moaned into Stephen's pillow as he felt his tightness all around him. He was still his; Brendan had been here last. It was so easy, so effortless to let himself feel and climax and _need _that contact between them; bodies flush against each other, legs rubbing together like sand paper, tongues exploring and desperate in their movements.

"Say it" Stephen commanded, his fingernails digging into Brendan's back.

"Only you" Brendan nuzzled against his neck, sucking deliciously on his earlobe. "Only you, Stephen"

Stephen shuddered beneath him, tightening all around him as they climaxed together; two pieces of a mismatched puzzle finally finding their place together again.

He rolled off him and in the same moment wrapped his arm around him, feeling that ownership and pride engulf and overwhelm him.

"This is it, Bren. Last chance, I mean it"

"I know" Brendan murmured, kissing the top of his head.

Xxx

And so here he was, in the crook of Brendan's arm once more. Tomorrow could bring chaos; no one would truly understand. Ste didn't himself; all he knew was that the pull would always be there, Brendan would always remain inside him in every conceivable way and that would never change. Brendan's promise echoed in his head and Ste found himself promising the same.

_Only you._


End file.
